An Attitude of Gratitude 

The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings.

- Eric Hoffer

Gratefulness, appreciation, and thankfulness are all synonyms for a feeling of gratitude.  But what is gratitude?  It is recognizing that what you have, what you were given, or what you have experienced has value.  Gratitude is easy to express when things are going well.  For instance, when you win the lottery, are selected to the college of your choice, or receive a promotion with a huge salary increase, you naturally feel thankful.

However, at other times, it can be somewhat challenging to feel gratefulness like when you are laid off or when your spouse/significant other leaves you or when you are diagnosed with a serious illness.  Painful, upsetting, and heartbreaking situations test our ability to be grateful.  At such times, we may ask, “why bother”?  It may seem easier to wallow in misery or despair than to try to find the value in the situation.  However, let’s examine several reasons for being grateful at these and other times.

First, for those with strong spiritual or religious beliefs, gratitude allows us to practice what we have been taught.  As with other virtues, it is one thing to talk about a principle; however, what really counts is being able to practice our beliefs, regardless of the circumstances.  Challenging situations allow many of us to “walk our talk”.

Second, being grateful can play a major role in our emotional and physical well-being.  In his studies, psychology researcher Philip Watkins found that people who engaged in appreciative activities, such as writing a thank you note, were more likely to be in a good mood than people who did not.

Third, individuals who express thankfulness to others are more likely to create situations where people want to be around them.  In the workplace, a grateful attitude can produce an environment where people want to do their best work.

I hope you will see the benefit of having a thankful spirit, not just at during the holidays, but throughout the year. Below are four practical tips to help you accomplish this task.

1. Consider writing in a gratitude journal.   Set aside time to jot down the things for which you are grateful.  Documenting reasons to be happy helps many people see their lives differently.  Writing reasons why you are thankful should be a regular activity done either daily or weekly.  This practice serves two purposes.  The first is it can put you in a more thankful frame of mind when you do it.  The second is it gives you a diary of your thoughts to read when you are finding it difficult to feel appreciative.

2. Another activity is regularly adding items to a gratitude box where you keep items that remind you of joy-filled times in your life.  The objects you place in it could be cards, photos, letters, small souvenirs, and keepsakes.  Like the gratitude journal, you can go through this box when you are facing life challenges and feeling miserable.  I have such a box, and I cannot fully explain to you the gratitude I feel when I look through all the items in it.  I can easily remember times that were special to me, and wonderful experiences for which I am immensely thankful.

3. Practice “relative to what” thinking.  This concept I read many years ago in the book Looking Out For #1 by Robert J. Ringer.  His theory of relativity (not to be confused with Einstein’s theory) states that we view many situations as being unfortunate until we think of them relative to more tragic circumstances.  Once we see things in a different perspective, we are able to view the exact same events with a sense of gratitude rather than feeling unhappy.

For example, let’s consider getting laid off.  Yes, that is a terrible situation to be in.  But when compared to finding out you or a loved one has a terminal illness, being laid-off seems minor.  Such thinking is best expressed in the quote “I once was distraught because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.” (author: unknown).

4. Avoid comparing your circumstances with those of others if it makes you ungrateful for what you have.  Many people do this with their relationships.  They think their spouse or “insignificant other” has not being as romantic as someone else, even worse a fictitious character in a movie.

Instead of appreciating their loved one for who he or she is, they place them under a comparative microscope.  This type of thinking isn’t limited to just relationships. People tend to criticize their jobs, homes, cars, children, parents, etc. based on some unrealistic ideal. Such a destructive practice will keep you in a state of continual ungratefulness.

So today decide which course of action is best for you: writing in a gratitude journal, creating a gratitude box, practicing the theory of relativity, or avoiding the comparison trap.  Once you have made a decision about which one will work best for you, practice that principle continuously and watch your attitude of gratitude increase immensely.

Here’s wishing that throughout the year, you can look at your life with eyes of gratitude.

Donna Satchell, President of STARR Consulting & Training is a speaker, trainer and author.  She provides programs in customer service, team-building, time management, public speaking as well as motivational speeches which inspire individuals to live more successful lives.  Please visit www.JustGetSerious.com for information about products and services as well as to view videos of Donna’s speeches.  Contact her at 770-498-0400 or Donna@JustGetSerious.com.

Copyright 2006-2007 - Donna Satchell   All rights reserved. 

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